Friends, I’m used to being Not Cool. I’ve actually pretty much based my social persona on being Not Cool and Proud of It, though of course I cry tiny tears of drama sometimes when the fact is pointed out to me. Which it is about once a week by some of my hurtful friends. You know who you are. Actually, you don’t, because none of my friends actually read my blog, the bastards.
So the fact that I am apparently the only nerd on Earth who has never read Watchmen doesn’t alarm me, much. It’s a little strange, though, how everyone seems to assume that I have, you know? Like this was some sort of seismic event in culture, a shared moment of wonder. For folks who did read the Graphic novel, I’m sure it was. It’s just the assumption that Nerd = Read Watchmen that somehow irritates me.
I’m not sure why. I realized long ago that just because my old friends and I can and do have entire conversations using Simpsons references and quotes doesn’t mean this is universal, and that people I like and enjoy can, in fact, not enjoy or be very meh about things I love. My brother, for example, is a fun guy to talk to about things, but we score very low on shared cultural experiences because he just doesn’t like the same things I do, and vice versa. So why, then, does it seem like every blog post or magazine article i read assumes that if I’m reading that blog post, I must have read and loved Watchmen? I feel like I have to assimilate or be scorned.
Of course, by all accounts Watchmen is worth my attention, so I should put down my Scotch, get over my instinctive resistance to any suggestion made by anyone, any time, and just read the thing. Ah, but should I wait to see the movie? On the one hand any movie worth watching does not require you to read the source material to be appreciated. On the other hand, how will I know about the in-jokes and meta references if I don’t? How will I pass amongst the True Nerds if I can’t speak the secrets? Well, the usual: I will carry smoke bombs, and whenever someone asks me something I can’t answer, I dash it to the floor, laugh like a hyena, and make a run for it. 46% of the time, it works every time.
Man, we need Nerd Boy Cliff’s Notes for Failed Nerds like me.
Yay me too!
I’m actually afraid to say that I’ve never read a comic book, since my title as Geek might be stripped from me. I’m afraid of what I would be asked to turn in so I could no longer impersonate one.
(Recently I have been reading Freakangels online, so I think I might be mending my ways.)
Say it ain’t so. Well, honestly I didn’t read it back in ’86 when it first came out, but I was 12 and reading Groo, and The Mighty Thor and GI Joe, of course. But I didn’t make it through college without that big yellow trade being forced into my hands. You will only be a full fledged nerd once you read it.
I like the Sex Panther reference at the end of your post – hysterical.
I’d never even heard of Watchmen before the movie was announced. It’s being discussed by my other nerdy friends like the messiah of all that is nerdsome has arrived- but in graphic novel form.
How about you see the movie, I’ll read the graphic novel, and we’ll both be able to securely say that our medium captured the characters better.
WATCHMEN IGNORANTS, UNITE! We shall overcome.
I will read it, someday; I have a strange resistance – the more people urge me to read/see/listen to something, the more I resist, until they go away and then I can read it in private and pretend I discovered it all on my own.
Sex Panther: I didn’t really love that movie, but that line is possibly the greatest line ever written, ever. Of course I *mis*quoted it there, but it’s so good you can mangle it and it is still hilarious.
Lunch, I like the compromise. But I am a lazy man, so lord knows when I’ll get to it. I have a lot of napping and boozing to do first.
J
Here, let me spoil it (a little bit) for you: assassinations of costumed adventurers turns out to be part of bizarre plot to save the world.
It really might be better to read the graphic novel first.
Are there monkeys?
Ha check this…
Rorschach dies!
What is this about watchmen, nerd, cool, uncool, and a cat in a bong? I only heard about the watchmen because of the movie and after finding out the novel is actually a decent piece of work i read it.
Smedley,
Demerits for mentioning the cat in a bong.
J
Well the movie lives up to the hype!
Still haven’t seen it, though I have seen the opening credits sequence and. . .goddamn, that’s a fine five minutes of film, you ask me.